40+ Harsh Realities for Young Adults

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Hello there! It’s been a while since I posted on here. I must admit I miss posting! It’s been crazy the past few weeks, so I didn’t have the time to post, but I am back and happy to be back.

Be Aware Of These Harsh Realities Before Turning 30 | Chiclypoised.com

Here are a few harsh life lessons I believe can be useful to know or learn during your 20s.

Some of these lessons I learned the hard way, I wish I was aware of them sooner because they could have saved me many disappointments.

Enjoy and you can add to the list below in the comments section because there are a few I am sure I didn’t add to this list.


Your happiness is your business, so don’t expect others to make it their priority.

Your happiness is your business, so don’t expect others to make it their priority.


If you don’t place a value on yourself don’t expect others to do so voluntarily.
If you don’t place a value on yourself don’t expect others to do so voluntarily.


Invest in yourself. You will be happy you did.
Invest in yourself. You will be happy you did.


Have backup “plans” instead of “plan”, just in case the original plan goes left more than once.
Have backup “plans” instead of “plan”, just in case the original plan goes left more than once.


Learn to be alone and love it.
Learn to be alone and love it.


Work hard and stay humble.
Work hard and stay humble.


New grads salary negotiations are important, don’t accept a job offer unless you negotiate your salary.
New grads salary negotiations are important, don’t accept a job offer unless you negotiate your salary.


Love who you are and be confident. Nothing in life is ever that serious to keep you from being your true self.
Love who you are and be confident. Nothing in life is ever that serious to keep you from being your true self.


Stand and speak up for yourself or be prepared to be disrespected, used and abused.
Stand and speak up for yourself or be prepared to be disrespected, used and abused.


Failure is part of life, so embrace it and learn from it quickly.
Failure is part of life, so embrace it and learn from it quickly.


You may have fewer friends than you think, so be careful who you share secrets with.
You may have fewer friends than you think, so be careful who you share secrets with.


Be positive. A lot more can be achieved when you have a positive mindset.
Be positive. A lot more can be achieved when you have a positive mindset.


Everyone is not out to get you, most are just looking out for their best interest, so don’t take it personally.
Everyone is not out to get you, most are just looking out for their best interest, so don’t take it personally.


Be grateful for the small accomplishments as much as the big accomplishments.
Be grateful for the small accomplishments as much as the big accomplishments.


Mostly everyone has problems, so while your problems might be unique they should not disrupt the lives of others.
Almost everyone has problems, so while your problems might be unique they should not disrupt the lives of others.


Take responsibility for your actions. It’s utterly self-fish not to.
Take responsibility for your actions. It’s utterly self-fish not to.


It’s easy to spend a $1 but it damn hard to turn $1 into $2. If it was easy we all would be rich by now. So, save! Save! Save! If it’s not a necessity you can live without it.
It’s easy to spend a $1 but it damn hard to turn $1 into $2. If it was easy we all would be rich by now. So, save! Save! Save! If it’s not a necessity you can live without it.


Give back when you can, because you never know when you will be the one needing a helping hand.
Give back when you can, because you never know when you will be the one needing a helping hand.


Patience and discipline will directly impact what you will accomplish in your life.
Patience and discipline will directly impact what you will accomplish in your life.


Stop the blame game. Every disappointment in life is not always someone else’s fault sometimes you just messed up or didn’t plan properly.
Stop the blame game. Every disappointment in life is not always someone else’s fault sometimes you just messed up or didn’t plan properly.


Silence is powerful so use it wisely. Learn to speak up if your voice will make a difference, but learn to keep quiet if it will cause more harm than good.
Silence is powerful so use it wisely. Learn to speak up if your voice will make a difference, but learn to keep quiet if it will cause more harm than good.


Think before you speak, because spoken words cannot be unspoken.
Think before you speak, because spoken words cannot be unspoken.


Invest in people who invest in you. Focus on the people who love and support you genuinely because these are your people.
Invest in people who invest in you. Focus on the people who love and support you genuinely because these are your people.


Everything does not need to be announced. Some things are just for your enjoyment.
Everything does not need to be announced. Some things are just for your enjoyment.


Life is hard but it can be harder with the wrong people in your life so choose your people wisely.
Life is hard but it can be harder with the wrong people in your life so choose your people wisely.


Strangers can become family and family can become strangers.
Strangers can become family and family can become strangers.


Your space is important. Learn how to draw the line and feel comfortable about it.
Your space is important. Learn how to draw the line and feel comfortable about it.


Be you and do you. Live your life fully without trying to please others.
Be you and do you. Live your life fully without trying to please others.


Plan your time or someone will gladly plan it for you.
Plan your time or someone will gladly plan it for you.

Set goals for yourself and work on them daily.
Set goals for yourself and work on them daily.

Don’t allow people to schedule your time in their calendar without your consent.
Don’t allow people to schedule your time in their calendar without your consent.

Learn to say no without feeling guilty or feeling the need to explain why.
Learn to say no without feeling guilty or feeling the need to explain why.

If it’s not your business to tell then keep quiet, remember silence is golden.
If it’s not your business to tell then keep quiet, remember silence is golden.

All congratulations are not always sincere so be selective with who you share your accomplishments with.
All congratulations are not always sincere so be selective with who you share your accomplishments with.

Never expect people to do for you what you won’t do for them.
Never expect people to do for you what you won’t do for them.


If you need a favor be respectful of the person’s time and ask directly don't beat around the bush.
If you need a favor be respectful of the person’s time and ask directly don’t beat around the bush.


Get a mentor. A good one can help you avoid the ditches along your journey.
Get a mentor. A good one can help you avoid the ditches along your journey.


Side hustles are important as much as a career so get one.
Side hustles are important as much as a career so get one.


Don't be afraid to promote yourself and create a personal brand.
Don’t be afraid to promote yourself and create a personal brand.


If you wrong apologize quickly and learn from your mistake. Don't try to be politically correct.
If you wrong apologize quickly and learn from your mistake. Don’t try to be politically correct.


People make mistakes so learn to forgive quickly but don't forget what the situation taught you.
People make mistakes so learn to forgive quickly but don’t forget what the situation taught you.


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6 thoughts on “40+ Harsh Realities for Young Adults”

  1. I’m so happy you reached out to me to join the Black Girl Fashion Pinterest board because your blog, especially this post is amazing! I’m 26 and each of these lessons have become more apparent to me recently.

    #11 “You may have fewer friends than you think, so be careful who you share secrets with.” hit home. I have a problem being vulnerable to the wrong ppl in hopes that it will build friendships. I’m taking this one to heart and treasuring it for a long time starting today.

  2. I am glad I reached out to you and I am thankful for your consideration :). I struggled with #11 for years but I recently made my peace with it – it wasn’t easy. I am thankful for the few true friends I have been blessed with. I no longer ignore the signs of the wrong friendships. When I spot them I let them go – these type of friendships are not worth the stress.

    Thanks for stopping by, I really appreciate it. I believe in time you will find your way around #11. The best friendships are a blessing 🙂

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